12-24-07 (Me to Babe)

Merry Christmas my love!I’m so glad you got, and like the snowflake. With your name on it, you just had to have one. Have fun at dinner with your family. Specially your Mom. Tell her I miss her, and sitting next to her at dinner, and breaking and sharing the nuts with her.

I’ll never forget Home Depot for the tree. It was a wonderful time, rain or no rain, because it was getting you just what you wanted. Any work around the house, setting the table, even helping you cook, and getting in your way, all make up what was a wonderful time in our lives. Times that make me cry when I realize they are gone (for now, maybe not forever), they are the good times we had.

By the way, It's good to hear you say you sound “whiney”, because I sound “sappy” so many times. There is nothing wrong with sounding the way you feel. Tonight, Im watching TV by myself, first its Madagascar –animated zoo movie— then CSI Miami. For me it’s just another night. Im making a sandwich and a soup for dinner. However, I will be thinking about you each and every minute of the night. Christmas day, I want to go to the park near the airport, where I can walk (it’s a mile once around) and sit and read my book. Thanks for getting me to read!
106

I’ll write for New Years.

Me

12-23-07 ( Babe to Me)


Hi,

Thank you so much for the beautiful snowflake. Leave it to you to make sure I had my very own special present this Christmas. It's so you. I hope you have a wonderful Christmas Eve and Day. My sister, Artie and the girls will be here tomorrow night with my mother. I know my mother will be asking for you. I'll tell her you send your regards to her as well. I was remembering how we went to Home Depot to get the real tree a few times. That was so great. I know I drove you nuts with cutting every tree to make sure it was the right one. That was alot of fun even though we were sometimes freezing. The boys helped me alot today getting set up, but I couldn't help but think about how you would do most of the work setting up the table and I would be in the kitchen cooking. I felt very sad the other day, when I was food shopping after work. It was about 8:30 pm and I was alone with the packages, and DAM I had to carry all of them!! It was a terrible feeling. But, at least, I was able to remember the good times too...except this time we weren't going out to dinner, then to Panera for coffee. I'm sorry I don't mean to sound whiney. I guess it hit me this year a bit more.

Thank you again for the thoughtful gift. It looks great on the tree.

Talk to you soon,

Me

12-15-07 (Babe to Me)


Thanks for writing back about the EZ Pass..I'll just dispose of the unit Ihave. Thanks again for not being upset with me.

The weather has definitely turned to winter...It's going down to the mid 20's tonight, but tomorrow should be a bit warmer. We are preparing for a Nor'Easter on Sunday. Hopefully the snow won't stay too long and getting to work on Monday will be ok. I'm going to try and wrap presents tonight, but I'm a little tired. I'll see how far I get. You know how much I dislike wrapping....even though I LIKE unwrappiing. We're putting the tree up tomorrow. Johnny was away in Washington for 10 days for his job and he just got home yesterday. We wanted to wait until he came home so we could decorate the tree together. Dukey is looking foreward to putting her new Christmas dress on and taking pictures........Oh my Gosh, my life blows...!!! I swear the dam dog loves to get dressed up. As soon as I say "Dukey you want ot put on your new dress, she starts barking and runnng around".....she probably thinks.."i better not piss off this crazy bitch, or I'll never eat again"!!!

Anyway, I'll talk to you again soon. Michael and my mom send regards.

Me

12-15-07 (Me to Babe)

Babe:

About the EZ Pass, the only thing you have to do is, don’t be sorry. Really. When I sent my tag back, I told them I had lost the other one. They charged the cost of the unit to the balance in the account and sent me a check for the balance left. I’m glad you told the boys to use it, and I am the one that’s sorry for not telling you about this before I sent it in.

The memories of eating lunch out, doing “serious damage” shopping in Walmart and the outlets stores, even dinners at Boulder Creek is what keeps me going from day to day. The times we went to Starbucks or Paneras and you would order our coffee for us, because I could not remember how to do it. Babe, what would life be for both of us if we weren’t so far apart?

There is one of those huge Walmart stores, like Toni’s, here in Hialeah. It’s huge. It’s like, but bigger, than Price Club. We could go in the morning, eat lunch, spend the afternoon, and get out in time to go out to Outbacks for dinner. That’s the kind of damage we could do. I’ve gone there with Luis, but after pushing him in the wheelchair for an hour, we usually leave. I miss it with you.

Please be careful with the nasty weather going your way. And, please don’t shovel the snow, save your back. Is there anything you need?
Me

12-13-07 (Babe to Me)

Hi,

I'm so sorry i didn't email sooner. John & Alicia took Michael too Atlantic City for his birthday, I told them to take the EZ Pass, but wasn't sure if they could still use it. I thought I would be billed on the Braves credit card for the toll charges. I'm really sorry. I forgot to ask if they were able to use it, unti9l I received your email. Should I mail mine back as well? I won't use it again. Just tell me where I should send it and I'll do it tomorrow. Also, I did receive a letter from MDNY stating that the insurance was cancelled as of Nove. 28th. It was a relief in a way that I didn't get you into any trouble because of me. Sorry again.

I want to thank you again for our phone conversation last week. It was so comforting and relaxing to talk. We seem to get along much more when we talk to each other now. It felt good. I know I can always count on you even if it's in the middle of the night and i need to call. Thanks you for that.

Well the weather has finally turned cooooooold! I think we're in for a big storm this weekend. I haven't quite finished my Christmas shopping yet. I do as much as I can online now. I miss when we use to go together. First lunch at Fridays, then serious shopping!!! And, as ususal, you made sure I had something for myself too. I remember spending alot of time (and money) in Walmart. Toni told me there is a Walmart in Pa. about 10 minutes from her house that's open 24 hours and it's immaculately clean. She said there is a supermarket in there. She also had her nails done and a pedicure in the salon in the store!!!! Just imagine the damage we could do there!!

I have to get some sleep now. It's been a long day. I'll call you soon. I didn't forget about the pictures.

Me.

12-8-07 (Me to Babe)

Babe:
Last week I sent the EZ Pass tag back to NY to close the account, and today I received an email statement from them showing the following charges:

November 17, at Verrazano Bridge and 4 other charges in NJ.
November 18, at the Outerbridge Crossing
November 18, in Asbury Park, NJ
They also indicate other charges dating back through 2006, but not detailed.

At first, I thought it may have been when you went to Stephanies Communion, but why the Verrazano? Why NJ tolls? Why Asbury Park? Please let me now if you made these charges, (I dont care if you did make them) or if the tag was used fraudulently.
Me

12-1-07 (Me to Babe)

Babe:

There is a bad storm heading your way for tomorrow, and I just want you, and the boys to be very careful if you go out. (hope you dont have to). What I have heard is its starting as snow, turning to ice, before it may turn to rain.

I want to thank you so much for the phone call the other day. You see, each time you call me, you bring me back to July 2005. And it gives me hope that maybe you still care, and that there is still hope for us. I really do not know how you feel because I feel you try to avoid the subject. I guess its a defensive move to protect yourself. Just so that we are clear on something, I have always told you that one phone call at any time would get me back into your life. But likewise, if you ever tell me there is someone else in your life, I will know not to pursue a dream I know will not materialize for me. So either way I hope someday you will indicate to me how you feel.

It is I who must apologize for getting you so upset about the MDNY issue, but I just wanted to give you a heads up on the phone call or letter in the mail. I really did not mean to get you upset. Also, I have not heard from them yet. When I do, I will let you know.For now, Babe, I just want you to know that if you ever need anything, please let me now.
Be careful tomorrow.
Me.

11/26/07 (Me to Babe)

Babe: I hope Im sending you this message in time. You will be receiving a call or perhaps a letter from a very nasty lady from MDNY. I did. She asked me a lot of questions about why the business address had been changed without them being notified. See, they mailed me the yearly premium increase notification, and it was sent to the Wantagh address, since its been more than a year the post office did not forward it to me, but returned it to them. That’s how they found out about the address.

Now, they are canceling the policy because it must be a NY address. She was very rude, asking many questions as to when the company ceased to do business. When was the last tax return submitted. And, what did I do with the one employee of the company (you). I tried to be very evasive, but she did tell me she had to contact you in order to find out about you.

So, I suggest, you mention as little as possible to her. But she will insist on knowing if you are still working for me, or when you stopped. When I left NY. And who know what else she will try to get out of you. Maybe say you continued to work for the company till end of November, even though I was not physically in NY. I was still the Broker of record with the State, and you were getting paid by me. As for you, maybe tell her you are not working now, (don’t say you are working off the books) and you do not have any private insurance coverage for yourself.

I really didn’t expect to have the insurance end this way. But want you to know that it might be a blessing in disguise. I prefer to send you money each time you go to your doctors, or have tests done, because it may actually be less expensive. I will write you again soon, but I just wanted to get this info to you as soon as possible. Please let me know if she does call you and what happens.

Be careful,
Me


11/19/07 (Me to Babe)

Babe,
It was great getting a letter from Mike. Just hearing from him made my day! I hope he will continue to keep in touch.Glad you got to go out a bit with them for his birthday. And specially to Houlihan's. Wasn't that the place you always wanted to go to try the spinach dip? Sorry I never took you there. Although the boys won't be with you on Thanksgiving, I will be with you in thought all day. You see, Thanksgiving means nothing to me without you. So, I will think about you all during the day. Oh, yes, I will also have your pictures with me!!!

Luis is not getting any better. I don't mention them often, because it will sound as if Im complaining. I see a negative fact, as sounding like a complaint, so I don't talk much about them. But for now, Luis is in a diaper! What else can I say.In your letter, you mention, "it's time for you to be happy have all the things you want.", well, Babe, what I have always wanted is just "you". Everything else will come. For now, I have your pictures, the memories, and each day I try to recall something we did, or you said, or you did, and that gets me through that day. For example: you putting your hand up. Or stamping your right foot. Or saying, Whaaaatever! Or that's f___ed up. Some little thing which is just you.
Babe, please have a nice day on Thursday, and maybe think of me a bit.
Me

PS: If Im getting too sappy or obsessive, let me know.

11-18-07 (Me to Mike)
Hi Michael
Im so glad to hear from you. Also, that you liked the pants. Hope you had a nice birthday day. I know you don't like too much attention on your special day. But, hope you did some special things. As for Florida, I do like the warm weather, but I miss all of you. Specially, getting Taco Bell and eating it watching TV. Here I have only been to Taco Bell a few times, to remember and think about you and Mom.
Michael, please know that you may write me any time you want. Tell me what is happening in your life. Or tell me if you or your Mom ever need anything.
Take care of yourself,
George


11-17-07 (Mike to Me)

Hi George

I just wanted to thank you very much for the card, and gift. It really meant a lot to me. I'm glad you remember that I liked the stooges so much. I hope everything is going well for you down in Florida, I know how you said you liked it down there. I'm still taking care of mom and we continue to enjoy Taco Bell all the time, it's the best stuff in the world! Thank you again George, take care.



11-17-07 ( Babe to Me)

Hi,

It was so nice that you remembered Michael's birthday. I didn't doubt for a minute that you would do something special for him. He was very touched that you sent him the present. He really likes that pj pants and said he knew you liked the 3 stooges too. He's going to email you to thank you for the gift and the beautiful card. He showed it to me because he said it made him feel good knowing that you still cared about both of us. It was really special to us. He put the card on the mantle with all the others. Thank you from me too. We went out to Houlihan's for dinner with John and John's girlfriend Alicia to Houlihan's. Michael wanted cheese fries and nachos, so that's where he picked to go. We had a nice time, but as usual, Michael didn't want us to tell the waitress that it was his birthday because ...well, do I have to tell you...you know how private Michael is!!...Anyway, we all went back to the house for cake and presents. Then Michael left to meet friends at Mulcahey's in Wantagh and John & Alicia went to the movies. So here I am emailing and folding laundry at midnight!!!

The boys are going to their dad's this year for Thanksgiving so I'm not having the holiday here. He asked if they could go there so I said that's fine with me. It's going to feel a bit strange, but I'm kind of glad I don't have to do all the cooking and setting up. Without sounding like a whiner, the jobs are getting the best of me and I definitely don't have the energy to do the holiday this year. I'm still having Christmas Eve with Jackie & Artie and my mother, and Christmas Day I'll be here with the boys and my mother(she'll stay a couple of days with me), then they're going to their dad's after dinner. It's going to be a change, but I'm OK with it. Actually, the cost of having the holiday dinner and Christmas presents is part of the issue as well. I don't want to have to work to pay off Christmas bills for a year. Don't know about any plans for New Year's yet.

How is everyone there? Is Luis getting any better or just the same? How about Julie? I bet you have your hands full. I know it's not nice to say, but I know what a responsibility (and some times even a burden) it may seem to be for you. I can definitely understand that. I wish life was better for you living there. I hope you can have what you've wanted for yourself very soon. I'll will continue to be grateful for everything you've done for me. I'll never forget your unending generousity and care. It's time for you to be happy and have all the things you want. You've taken care of everyone for so long. Take care of yourself. I'll email again soon.

Thank you again for having a special place in your heart for Michael.

Me

11-11-07 (Me to Babe)
Babe:
I am so happy to hear your test was negative. Praying does pay off. Your health is most important, so do whatever she says, and take care of yourself. Remember, there is only one you.

Don't worry about emailing me. I know you work hard, have little extra time, and are tired when you get home. Just knowing you are okay is all I care about.

Im sending Mike a present for his birthday, should arrive by Thursday. Want to make sure he gets it before Friday. Please take care of yourself, be happy, enjoy the kids.
Me


11-11-07 (Babe to Me)

Hi,

I'm so sorry about not emailing. There is no excuse. My doctor called me on Friday to let me know the biopsys came back negative (that's a good thing)! She said I had to be re-checked in 6 months, but I'm not concerned about that right now. I'm just happy that everything was good. I emailed you a few days ago about sending pictures this week. Did you receive that one? I'll try and be better about keeping in touch. I read your email about the holidays. I'll email you with everything about the holidays when I'm at work tomorrow. I have to go and make breakfast for the boys and get some stuff done around the house while the weather is still a bit mild. Take care of yourself.
My mom and Michael send regards.

Me


11-10-07 (Me to Babe)

Babe:
Perhaps there is nothing to worry, or you may not want me to worry, but since I haven't heard from you about the doctors appointment and what has happened, Im am a bit concerned.I understand you are busy with work, but please let me know what happened at your doctors appointment. Even though the test results may not be in yet, just a few words about what he did,or found. And that you are okay now. Do you need anything?
Thanks Babe,
Me

10-31-07 (Me to Babe)

Babe:
Well Babe, I want to share with you something I feel. November starts the worst part of the year for me. Its actually a very depressing 60 days ahead. First, comes our anniversary date from when we met. Then comes Michael's birthday. And, Thanksgiving day with you and your family. After that, are all the sights and sounds of the Christmas Holidays. Then, of course, Christmas eve and Christmas day. Then a week later is New Years eve, and New Years day. It is a very depressing time for me. See, Julie doesn’t celebrate Thanksgiving and she doesn’t go out to stores, and if its anything like last year, we won't be exchanging any gifts on Christmas day either. And, of course New Years, she goes to sleep about 8pm, so there won't be any festivities with that either.

I want you to know I will be spending those days re-living the memories we shared, so I will be with you fixing everything on Wednesday evening for Thanksgiving dinner at your house. Then sitting next to your mother and Michael on Thursday. I will also be thinking about you sitting on the floor in your living room exchanging gifts with your family on Christmas eve. And, of course, I will be mentally enjoying the “egg in the bread” on Christmas morning. For New Years eve, you can expect I will email you a short letter at midnight. It reminds me of the times I used to spend New Years eve, outside your house, in my car, watching the little green TV.

I sincerely hope you have a nice time during the Holidays, but I also hope you think of me and what we used to do, every once in a while. Please let me know if you do something different so I can think of you.
Me


10-27-07 (Me to Babe)
Hi Babe:

First, good luck on Monday. I will be thinking and praying for you. Just what are they doing to you? Secondly, thanks for talking to your mom about us. Specially the nice things you told her about me. Third, sorry about the time you had at the confirmation, but I guess it was nice for Stephanie to have you there. Good old Artie, he will never complain, you are right. But, how come the restaurant guy did not reimburse your sister for the full bill? She would get it all back.

Please, Babe, take care of yourself, and if there is anything you need, anything, let me know. Im here for you.
Me


10-28-07 (Babe to Me)

I just realized that I haven't sent you any pictures
yet...sorry, I promise I'll send them this week. Also, I wanted to let you
know my mother was asking for you. We were at Stephanie's
confirmation by Jackie & Artie's last Sunday. After the (2 hr.!!!)
ceremony, we all went to a restaurant which was absolutely horrible.
It was the same place that we went to last February for Nicole's Sweet sixteen
party. The food that day was really good, so they decided to go there for
Steph's confirmation as well. When we arrived it was crowded but Artie had
made a reservation because we were about 15 people with Artie's family. We
had to wait about 20 minutes to be seated and, of course, I had to put my socks
on because it was cold in there!!!! Then there were two flies around
the table being very annoying and the food was
disgusting. Jackie complained to the owner, but he kind of brushed
her off. I felt bad for her,because I think she was a bit
embarrassed. You know Artie will never complain to anyone, but I'm glad
Jackie spoke up for herself. Anyway, I was absolutely sick to my stomach
all the way home which seemed like it took 5 hrs.! The good part was
that I sat next to my mom and she was asking how you were doing and if you
were enjoying Miami. She said she could understand living where the sun is
shining and nice and warm all the time. I asked her about moving back, she
said she's going to look at some places here during her visit, but that she was
ready to move back. I'll let you know about that when I know more
info. She was happy when I told her we keep in touch and email often and
speak occasionally. She said she liked talking to you about Vegas and was
comforted about the way you cared about me and took care of me. Anyway,
it's early Sunday morning and I'm going back to bed for a little bit. I
have my gyn procedure Monday afternoon, so I'll email you with any
information. Keep a good thought for me. I'll talk to you